Keeping Our Eyes Fixed on Jesus
Often, I point out how poor the rich man in the Gospel was. For starters, he had no electricity, no (Mk 10:21-22)running water, no infrastructure for roads, and no medical system. He probably had three robes, some servants, a mule or a horse if he was really wealthy and some land. In a few decades, all would be lost with the invasion of the Romans. “Jesus looked steadily at him and loved him…he went away sad for he was a man of great wealth.”
In contrast to the rich man’s clear rejection, the disciples continued their journey with Jesus. They were filled with broken dreams, confusion and fear but in the end, they were faithful. They were learning that the heart is a battlefield of good and evil. Likewise, they experienced the heart creating idols which distorted reality; it also blinded and hardened the spirit.
In their struggle to understand Jesus, the disciples began to recognize the human dilemma of the impact of the fragmented heart. They were living what Paul articulated a few decades later in Romans: “We know that the law is spiritual but I am carnal sold into slavery to sin. What I do, I do not understand. For I do not what I want, but I do what I hate.” (Romans 7: 14-15)
The second half of the Gospel of Mark portrays the disciples as a group on the edge of disillusionment. They are dealing with the frightening call to walk with Jesus to Jerusalem and the absolute shattering of their dreams and ambitions.
All the while Jesus continues calling them into the light, proclaiming the truth and preparing them to be free of the bondage of their self-absorption. The war in their fragmented hearts raged on.
They were struggling with new self-knowledge that shattered their illusion of seeing Jesus as their ticket to power, wealth and privilege.
After their rejection and abandonment of Jesus on that fatal weekend they still clung together in bewilderment and at the edge of despair only to have Jesus appear with the incredibly merciful, “Peace be with you” (Jn 20:21). There was no finger pointing only unconditional acceptance and encouragement. Now with this last piece of the puzzle, the Resurrection, in their hand, it was their job to put the mystery of Jesus together in their lives. This experience of God’s mercy renewed their commitment. They were ready to shed the uncertainty and fright and walk with Jesus in spite of the continuing ambiguity of life.
Moving from Religion to Spirituality
The disciples are a good mirror for us. We share their uncertainty and anxiety in the midst of our illusions that move us to seek happiness and security in the wrong places.We too suffer the consequences of a fragmented heart. We try to get by with the minimum for God and the maximum for ourselves. However, there tends to eventually surface an emptiness deep in our being. The “does” and “don’ts” of our religion no longer are enough. The question of the rich young man is rooted in the inevitable pull of the heart for something more.
This is where we move from our comfortable and safe approach to God in our religious rituals and practices to a search for something more profound. Spirituality is the whole process of growth from inauthenticity into full relationship with God and the possession one’s truth in the image of God. Spirituality draws us into the struggle where we move away from the shallow and illusionary to a more authentic relationship with God. This is a move from the formality of religion to a deeper spiritual path.
The Gospel reveals to us the basis of all spirituality and calls us to the simplicity of Christian identity. It teaches us that to be a disciple of Jesus is to follow him, and that this is what Christian life is. Jesus basically demanded that we follow him, and the measure of our embracing the Gospel is our response to this call.
In spite of our progress, we will eventually face the challenge of compromise. This is the ego’s desperate maneuver to maintain control. We seek a space between the demands of the Gospel and the comfort of the world. We subtly create our own gospel and make Jesus over in our image. Like Peter after his fatal rejection, Jesus does not give up on us. He is always calling us to life. Each crisis manifests a deeper insight into the depth of our weakness and the grandeur of God’s merciful love revealed in Christ Crucified and Christ Risen.
It is right at this juncture that the genius of St. Teresa of Avila can be a great help. She is called the Mother of spirituality. She offers us the challenge of addressing a few fundamental steps to grasp the call of personal authenticity that is central to any spirituality. First, we need to grow in self-knowledge that leads to humility. We then accept the consequences of this emerging insight: the interplay of our personal limits and the mercy of God. This is all done in prayer which she describes as a conversation with someone we know loves us. Keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus nurtures this development. This is the story of the disciples. This is our story if we are open to the call.
For Teresa, it is the personal encounter in following Jesus that unveils the loving mercy of God. This gift has its privileged communication in prayer. Prayer is always her top priority. The prayerful encounter with Jesus constantly stands at the center of our pursuit of God, the final desire of the human heart.
Who do You Say that I Am?
The Gospels have many lessons. Few are more important than to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus. Walking with Jesus goes beyond the teachings of the Church, beyond reading the Bible, beyond any devotions or other favorite religious expressions. Following Jesus is at the heart of authentic spirituality. Following Jesus turns our lives upside down. Following Jesus is the same today as it was in the day of the disciples. It calls one out of comfortable hiding places and take us “where you do not want to go.” (Jn 21:18)The Gospels are structured so that we, like Peter and the rest, meet Jesus in the wonders of his ministry. We are called to witness his teachings and healings. We are challenged to respond to his radical message of forgiveness and inclusion. We are invited to ponder the wonder of his compassion. We are invited to enter into the stories. It helps to see ourselves as the person who gains sight, the leper who is cleansed, and the paralytic who is forgiven and healed.
In this way, we are led to the critical question, “Who do you say I am?” (Mk 8:29) There is no more important question and challenge in our life. Who is Jesus for us?
For the disciples and us the message comes slowly. We are on the road but our encounter with Jesus is always partial and incomplete. The encounter with Jesus always comes at a price, and a price that continues to escalate. At the heart of the encounter with Jesus is a transition moving from our vision for happiness, from our priorities, to the new world of Jesus’ vision and call. This conversion process repeats itself as we stay faithful with Jesus on the road to Jerusalem. Prayer leads to an ever-expanding awareness of God’s will. A new and deeper experience of prayer flowing from this conversion empowers us to live in a way that is more and more guided by God’s will. Eventually it calls us to say no to all that is not God. This struggle gradually reveals that the story of our life is the story of God’s mercy.
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