This is the fifth of eleven reflections on Thomas Merton’s teaching on the True Self/False Self dynamic. This conflictual but enlightening relationship permeates Merton’s huge quantity of writing on the spiritual life. The basic point of the conflict is the individual’s pull toward and away from God, one’ true and ultimate destiny. Merton’s exposure of the consequences of original sin is ruthless in its intensity. This is the task of the False Self. At the same time, the pull of the True Self, the ever-present call of God’s personal and passionate love, is even more powerful. The human heart is the battlefield of this seemingly endless confrontation.
Part Two
The Two Blind Men
Mark bookends his story of The Road to Jerusalem with the healing of two blind men. In the first healing, there are two stages to the restoration of sight. At first he says, “I see people looking like trees and walking.” (Mk 8:24) Then, Jesus laid his hands on him a second time, and he saw clearly.In this miracle, Mark is showing us that we always will get Jesus’ message in stages. The first blind man is an example for the poor befuddled Apostles and us.
The second blind man has a message for us also. The primary issue of the whole section is to join Jesus, on his terms, on the road to Jerusalem. The Apostles were confused and bewildered in the whole process.
The second blind man becomes a model of a true disciple for us. The story of his cloak revealed a wholehearted commitment to follow Jesus. When Jesus called him, he casts away the cloak. This is critical because the cloak was the primary source of his income. In the common practice of the day, the beggar would place the cloak in front of him to receive the alms. Likewise, the cloak was his only protection from the cold desert nights.
Mark describes it as follows: “He threw aside his cloak, sprang up, and came to Jesus…Immediately he received his sight and followed him on the way.” (Mk10:50 -52)
Conclusion
Vast areas of our mind and heart are out of tune with values of the gospel. Most often, we are just not aware of the chasm in our heart. This is because of the influence and control of the False Self, our heritage from Original Sin. We are deluded. We just do not see how far we are from true allegiance to Jesus and his gospel call.Periodically, we are awakened to see that we are called to a deeper level of generous response and sacrifice. It might be the witness of a person whose life invites us further into the gospel. At times, it is a movie or book. Sometimes spiritual reading or a homily touches the depth of our heart. More often than not, it is a crisis in our life. Always, there is the Word of God in the Scriptures or in the profound and challenging experiences in our life. All of these encounters highlight the perennial battle within us of the False Self and the True Self, of sin and grace, of good and evil. It is a battle to the end. Too often, it is a battle we do everything possible to avoid.
In her classic, The Interior Castle, Teresa of Avila offers a wonderful insight into these matters. She describes the person’s situation in the Third Dwelling Places. The person has made some noteworthy progress.
However, Teresa points out a real danger to further progress. The individual at this point of development has a deep sense of having arrived. They are ready to settle down and bask in their spiritual achievements. In fact, they are just beginning. Spiritual pride is a monster at all levels but especially in this early stage of the journey.
This is the implication of Merton’s False Self/True Self struggle. We need to always see ourselves at the beginning of the pilgrimage to God. We are sinners in need of God’s mercy, always and everywhere.
True humility will let us see the magnificence of God’s mercy and our constant need to be seeking it. Deep personal prayer energizes this scared quest.
